A Top Ten Guide...
- Thread starter Rising Sun
- Start date
Help Support MotoGP Forum:
- Status
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2006
- Messages
- 445
- Location
- Adelaide, Australia
Sorry for the delay--it's almost done. But you can blame the pricks at Nippon TV. I didn't get to watch the race until this morning, because the fuckers pulled a fast one with the schedule on Sunday. They're all trousers, the lot of 'em.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2006
- Messages
- 445
- Location
- Adelaide, Australia
Round Thirteen
The Top Ten Reasons Why Rossi Didn’t Win In Misano.
10. Sylvain Guintoli. France and technology go together like John Hopkins and fashion. When the devious Guintoli was stealing Rossi’s Wudy (for luck) after the warm-up on Sunday, he noticed some fancy electronics on the bike: “Mine doesn’t have anything like that,” he thought. “Hmm... I wonder what happens if you press that button?” Rossi retires on lap 5, that’s what, Sylvain.
9. The popularity contest. Rossi was too busy to worry about racing on Sunday, because he was going head to head in a popularity contest with the Pope. Final scores: at Misano, some 60,000; at Loreto, about 300,000. Despite getting trounced 5 – 1, Rossi was reported to have said, “Is a closer result than I’ll get to Stoner on the track.”
8. Michelin. It wouldn’t seem right if we didn’t blame them. After all, Jean-Philippe Weber was spotted apologizing to Rossi and Brivio, purely out of reflex. Speaking of Jean-Philippe, this quote from him is the new benchmark as the definition of optimism: “We’re open to the possibility of more teams signing up with us next year.”
7. Team Rizla Suzuki. The sight of not one, but two girly-blue Suzukis in the top 3 fried Rossi’s brain, and his bike went out in sympathy. It seems that in 2007 the boys from Hamamatsu, Shizuoka have finally realised that 4-strokes doesn’t mean a quick .....
6. Pneumatics. Perhaps if Rossi had embraced Elisabetta after winning at Mugello instead of Uccio he would have been able to pass on some knowledge to his team about pneumatics; at least he’d know how hard to push (or squeeze) before something went pop.
5. Superstition. Anyone notice that on Sunday Rossi didn’t walk straight out of his garage, bend, flex, and go into squat-chat and foot-peg-fondling mode immediately? Because the Misano track layout is reversed, his bike was facing towards the left, so he had to walk all the way around it first before he could complete his rituals. Cue the “Twilight Zone” theme. No wonder he had problems...
4. The Fashion Victims. The pre-race press conference on Thursday taught us a couple of things: 1) John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth), and 2) Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida. Whatever, Rossi—looking tasteful as ever in his gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing—didn’t want to be seen in another photograph with either of them that weekend. Given their recent form, that meant staying as far away from the podium as possible. His supposed “mechanical” DNF made that a certainty and allowed him to look stylish in defeat.
3. God Complex. Winning MotoGP races and championships are trivial pursuits, for mere mortals. His Rossifuminess is concerned with the big picture. First, there were floods of biblical proportions on Friday, then on Saturday morning, a pilgrimage from his place of birth to the track by 800 of his most devout disciples. His time has come. Yellow will be the new holy white for priests, and all shall wear a gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing.
2. It was boring. So ....... boring. Rossi—.bored.to.........tears.—pulled off track of his own accord on lap 5, since Stoner had already lapped the entire field twice. He, like so many of his fans, finds MotoGP... hmm, what’s the word... um... ah, yes... BORING when he isn’t winning: “... right now I’m not in a position to win. That’s what I can’t stand.”
And the number one reason why Rossi didn’t win in Misano:
After a better showing in practice and a strong performance in qualifying, Rossi must have been confident of a podium or better when he lined up on the grid. He had no reason to think his engine would wreck any hope he had of keeping the pressure on Stoner in the last third of the season. But on lap 5 his engine broke and that was that. So, barring a bad case of the dePuniet’s, Stoner will wrap up the championship within the next three rounds.
The Top Ten Reasons Why Rossi Didn’t Win In Misano.
10. Sylvain Guintoli. France and technology go together like John Hopkins and fashion. When the devious Guintoli was stealing Rossi’s Wudy (for luck) after the warm-up on Sunday, he noticed some fancy electronics on the bike: “Mine doesn’t have anything like that,” he thought. “Hmm... I wonder what happens if you press that button?” Rossi retires on lap 5, that’s what, Sylvain.
9. The popularity contest. Rossi was too busy to worry about racing on Sunday, because he was going head to head in a popularity contest with the Pope. Final scores: at Misano, some 60,000; at Loreto, about 300,000. Despite getting trounced 5 – 1, Rossi was reported to have said, “Is a closer result than I’ll get to Stoner on the track.”
8. Michelin. It wouldn’t seem right if we didn’t blame them. After all, Jean-Philippe Weber was spotted apologizing to Rossi and Brivio, purely out of reflex. Speaking of Jean-Philippe, this quote from him is the new benchmark as the definition of optimism: “We’re open to the possibility of more teams signing up with us next year.”
7. Team Rizla Suzuki. The sight of not one, but two girly-blue Suzukis in the top 3 fried Rossi’s brain, and his bike went out in sympathy. It seems that in 2007 the boys from Hamamatsu, Shizuoka have finally realised that 4-strokes doesn’t mean a quick .....
6. Pneumatics. Perhaps if Rossi had embraced Elisabetta after winning at Mugello instead of Uccio he would have been able to pass on some knowledge to his team about pneumatics; at least he’d know how hard to push (or squeeze) before something went pop.
5. Superstition. Anyone notice that on Sunday Rossi didn’t walk straight out of his garage, bend, flex, and go into squat-chat and foot-peg-fondling mode immediately? Because the Misano track layout is reversed, his bike was facing towards the left, so he had to walk all the way around it first before he could complete his rituals. Cue the “Twilight Zone” theme. No wonder he had problems...
4. The Fashion Victims. The pre-race press conference on Thursday taught us a couple of things: 1) John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth), and 2) Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida. Whatever, Rossi—looking tasteful as ever in his gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing—didn’t want to be seen in another photograph with either of them that weekend. Given their recent form, that meant staying as far away from the podium as possible. His supposed “mechanical” DNF made that a certainty and allowed him to look stylish in defeat.
3. God Complex. Winning MotoGP races and championships are trivial pursuits, for mere mortals. His Rossifuminess is concerned with the big picture. First, there were floods of biblical proportions on Friday, then on Saturday morning, a pilgrimage from his place of birth to the track by 800 of his most devout disciples. His time has come. Yellow will be the new holy white for priests, and all shall wear a gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing.
2. It was boring. So ....... boring. Rossi—.bored.to.........tears.—pulled off track of his own accord on lap 5, since Stoner had already lapped the entire field twice. He, like so many of his fans, finds MotoGP... hmm, what’s the word... um... ah, yes... BORING when he isn’t winning: “... right now I’m not in a position to win. That’s what I can’t stand.”
And the number one reason why Rossi didn’t win in Misano:
After a better showing in practice and a strong performance in qualifying, Rossi must have been confident of a podium or better when he lined up on the grid. He had no reason to think his engine would wreck any hope he had of keeping the pressure on Stoner in the last third of the season. But on lap 5 his engine broke and that was that. So, barring a bad case of the dePuniet’s, Stoner will wrap up the championship within the next three rounds.
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Rising Sun @ Sep 6 2007, 03:27 PM) [snapback]89308[/snapback]<div class='quotemain'>
6. Pneumatics. Perhaps if Rossi had embraced Elisabetta after winning at Mugello instead of Uccio he would have been able to pass on some knowledge to his team about pneumatics; at least he’d know how hard to push (or squeeze) before something went pop.
priceless.
BEN
Site Founder
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2005
- Messages
- 4,483
- Location
- Lancashire UK
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Rising Sun @ Sep 6 2007, 03:27 PM) [snapback]89308[/snapback]<div class='quotemain'>
John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth),
Man that had me laughing!!!!!!!!!
John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth),
Man that had me laughing!!!!!!!!!
- Joined
- Feb 26, 2007
- Messages
- 343
- Location
- Jersey, Channel Islands
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Rising Sun @ Sep 6 2007, 03:27 PM) [snapback]89308[/snapback]<div class='quotemain'>
Round Thirteen
The Top Ten Reasons Why Rossi Didn’t Win In Misano.
7. Team Rizla Suzuki. The sight of not one, but two girly-blue Suzukis in the top 3 fried Rossi’s brain, and his bike went out in sympathy. It seems that in 2007 the boys from Hamamatsu, Shizuoka have finally realised that 4-strokes doesn’t mean a quick .....
4. The Fashion Victims. The pre-race press conference on Thursday taught us a couple of things: 1) John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth), and 2) Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida. Whatever, Rossi—looking tasteful as ever in his gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing—didn’t want to be seen in another photograph with either of them that weekend. Given their recent form, that meant staying as far away from the podium as possible. His supposed “mechanical” DNF made that a certainty and allowed him to look stylish in defeat.
oooh my sides are so splitting
get me a nurse
Round Thirteen
The Top Ten Reasons Why Rossi Didn’t Win In Misano.
7. Team Rizla Suzuki. The sight of not one, but two girly-blue Suzukis in the top 3 fried Rossi’s brain, and his bike went out in sympathy. It seems that in 2007 the boys from Hamamatsu, Shizuoka have finally realised that 4-strokes doesn’t mean a quick .....
4. The Fashion Victims. The pre-race press conference on Thursday taught us a couple of things: 1) John Hopkins gets dressed in the dark (or by the light of his luminous teeth), and 2) Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida. Whatever, Rossi—looking tasteful as ever in his gay-looking-yellow-golf-hat-visor-thing—didn’t want to be seen in another photograph with either of them that weekend. Given their recent form, that meant staying as far away from the podium as possible. His supposed “mechanical” DNF made that a certainty and allowed him to look stylish in defeat.
oooh my sides are so splitting
get me a nurse
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE<div class='quotemain'>8. Michelin. It wouldn’t seem right if we didn’t blame them. After all, Jean-Philippe Weber was spotted apologizing to Rossi and Brivio, purely out of reflex. Speaking of Jean-Philippe, this quote from him is the new benchmark as the definition of optimism: “We’re open to the possibility of more teams signing up with us next year.”
That’s another beauty sun!!! But #8 is...
That’s another beauty sun!!! But #8 is...
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2006
- Messages
- 1,745
- Location
- Sheffield/York
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Rising Sun @ Sep 6 2007, 03:27 PM) [snapback]89308[/snapback]<div class='quotemain'>
Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida.
classic!
Nicky Hayden is a Yorkshire Dandy wannabe or is taking fashion tips from old, retired guys down in Florida.
classic!
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2006
- Messages
- 445
- Location
- Adelaide, Australia
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Racejumkie @ Sep 19 2007, 02:21 AM) [snapback]91476[/snapback]<div class='quotemain'>
It sucks we won't get a top ten this race!
Ah, but there will be! It's coming... probably tomorrow night.
It sucks we won't get a top ten this race!
Ah, but there will be! It's coming... probably tomorrow night.
- Status
