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Stoner beats Rossi hands down
Sepang Test: Day 3
(07/02/2009)
Former MotoGP world champion and current MotoGP 'tears at bedtime' champion Casey Stoner fired a warning shot to all his rivals whilst giving us, the drowsy followers, all the indications that the racing recession will continue deep into 2009.
It was all set to be a battle of the gammy hands as Stoner, fresh from an operation to cure an inherited Australian wrist injury usually aggravated by opening tins of beer and punching wives, took on the cut fingers of the clumsy curtain closing Rossi.
There were to be no words spoken and for safety reasons there'd be no congratulative back patting.
Feeling left out, however, worse the time he was invited to heroes convention was the undersized yet overrated Spaniard Dani Pedrosa. Dani had a gammy knee whereas his rivals had gammy hands. It was Michelin/Bridgestone saga all over again. In the spirit of MotoGP Pedrosa decided to quit and travelled home to see if Alberto could dream up a way to damage his wrist.
Hands up who's hand hurts the most. Stoner was again top of the list
So the battle was on – and despite Stoner's fanbase shrinking faster than Hodgson's bank balance it was transparently obvious that his confidence in his own ability was rapidly expanding. A bit like Foggy – only this was real life.
In the end Rossi had no answer to Casey's brilliance and had to settle for second which subsequently sent millions of yellow fans with '46' somewhere in their email address to post a torrent of messages claiming that testing means nothing and Stoner's bike was better.
Spurred on by the threat of Suzuki not making it to Mugello Loris Capirossi once again rode like his career and tax-problems depended on it finishing the day in an impressive third. Being on a pay-by-race scheme the Italian looked eager to earn his keep with the imminent threat of one of his houses being repossessed on his mind.
Colin Edwards spectacularly dragged the midfield mediocrity all the way up to fourth one barbeque scented place ahead of Honda's prodigal simpleton Toni Elias.
On the 'it's only testing and it means nothing' end of the timesheet Sete Gibernau was finding out the hard way that greasy smiles, sneaky tests and oily handshakes are all fine up until the point where you have to prove your worth. And despite a comedy haircut few were laughing as the Jester of pack struggled to keep pace with big boys.
Saying at the blunt end de Puniet and Takahashi successfully proved that there'll be plenty of underachieving Hondas this season finishing one place ahead of the outclassed Niccolo 'King of the Sandwich, not of the track' Canepa.
But the biggest 'Pang loser was for sure James Toseland. After banging his head into b-flat in a 200kph crash on the opening day the Northern Dullard struggled to find focus and finished the final day as the last official rider…and only just ahead of the nameless Yamaha test drones brought in especially to make JT look good.
Sepang MotoGP test times - Saturday
1. Casey Stoner AUS Ducati Marlboro Team 2min 1.043 sec
2. Valentino Rossi ITA Fiat Yamaha Team 2min 1.137 sec
3. Loris Capirossi ITA Team Suzuki 2min 1.262 sec
4. Colin Edwards USA Tech 3 Yamaha 2min 1.413 sec
5. Toni Elias SPA San Carlo Honda Gresini 2min 1.560 sec
6. Chris Vermeulen AUS Team Suzuki 2min 1.666 sec
7. Jorge Lorenzo SPA Fiat Yamaha Team 2min 1.907 sec
8. Andrea Dovizioso ITA Repsol Honda Team 2min 1.955 sec
9. Mika Kallio FIN Pramac Racing 2min 2.386 sec
10. Nicky Hayden USA Ducati Marlboro Team 2min 2.497 sec
11. Alex de Angelis RSM San Carlo Honda Gresini 2min 2.523 sec
12. Sete Gibernau SPA Onde 2000 Ducati 2min 2.727 sec
13. Randy de Puniet FRA LCR Honda MotoGP 2min 3.418 sec
14. Yuki Takahashi JPN Team Scot 2min 3.474 sec
15. Niccolo Canepa ITA Pramac Racing 2min 3.901 sec
16. James Toseland GBR Tech 3 Yamaha 2min 3.953 sec
17. 'Bike #T' JPN Yamaha Test Rider 2min 4.328 sec
18. 'Bike #0' JPN Yamaha Test Rider 2min 4.614 sec
Either his official no-bedroom studio garage/home in Palermo or his million dollar villa in Monaco that, for tax reasons, he hardly ever visits. Honest.