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MotoGP race report, Mugello
Seven in a row and three in a row for Rossi
(02/06/2008)
Some things have an air of inevitably about them. Take the bi-monthly Foggy biographies – you just know it will contain the word 'I' more than any other word. Or take a far less sour grapefruit – you just know it will squirt you with concentrated citric acid in your eye the moment you cautiously stick your spoon in.
At Mugello everyone just knew that Rossi would win. The aromatic Italian had won at Mugello for the past six years and this year, unlike the last two visits, Rossi was already on a high.
Colin Edwards calls Valentino Rossi 'The GOAT'. Thankfully this has nothing to do with those unsettling rumours of the time the Italian became trapped in his motorhome with Nicky Hayden. The G.O.A.T, Colin claims, stands for Greatest Of All Time - although some say the American uses a different word for 'G' when referencing the time Rossi was trapped in his motorhome.
(Interestingly Pedrosa is known as P.I.G. (Personality Inexcusably Gone) where as Edwards himself is not ever known as C.O.W (can often win)).
After his dip in form over the past two seasons Rossi again looks like the GOAT we all knew he was.
So, as predicted, Rossi did win. But sadly he was taking no chances this time. In the good old days Rossi just couldn't loose – he was the Schumacher of MotoGP only far more popular and less of a dirty cheat. In them days Rossi would take a leaf out of my cat's book of etiquette and, for his enjoyment and ours, play with his prey tossing them around the garden before chewing their head's off.
But things have changed. In 2006 proceedings turned sourer than a Pedrosa family grown lemon. Suddenly the wins weren't a formality. That year Nicky Hayden won the world championship. Understandably Rossi presumed that a high magnetic field, caused by solar unbalance, must have corrupted the fabric of continuity and that normal service would resume for 2007. But it never did and this time the world championship winner, Casey Stoner, actually deserved to win the title.
All of which meant that come Sunday Valentino was taking no chances and after his usual average get away stormed to the front of the field and rode away to take the flag. It wasn't a classic race. Indeed it wasn't even a 'forgotten era' race. After breaking away from his rivals the furry 46 eased out the gap in a mediocre style that would have had any F1 fan grinning from ear-to-ear whilst downloading Max Mosley videos.
So, with the top slot of the podium being more secure than the scaffolding around the chin of a Schumacher statue who was up for taking the Mamola honours?
Sadly the possible candidates of Loris 'Leaky' Capirossi and King Midas Lorenzo would falter and fall.
Hang on…" you ask "Capirossi?" Well sort of. In qualifying the lung-split Italian managed to land himself on the front row. To achieve this Loris teamed up with chum Rossi and slipstreamed the Yam rider throughout final qualifying to gain that all important extra edge. If Loris wasn't small or was German then this would have been branded as 'filthy cheating' but because he's knee-high to smoking imp then his on-track swindling was reclassified as 'cheeky'. Sadly for Loris this didn't work when the taxman came knocking at his door.
Nevertheless, and not taking German tactics into consideration, Loris and Suzuki seemed to have upped the pace (at Vermeulen's expense) and altogether looked stronger than at any other time this season. But it wasn't to be. Little Loris found himself crowded out like the time he was queuing for sparrow rations with adults and could only manage a disappointing sixth/Edwardth position.
And what of Lord Loony Lorenzo? We all know that when the chips are down, or in his bones, he never fails to impress. Until today. After a brilliant start from the third row his golden nuggets were up into sixth and looking sparkling. But for once his gold became tarnished as the savour of MotoGP lost control of his Yamaha like his grip on reality. Into the gravel he went, nuggets and all.
So taking up the challenge were the personality aloof pairing of Stoner and Pedrosa. Off the track the pairing are becoming great rivals – Pedrosa's the reigning 'miserable ....' champion but Stoner, and his 'it's not fair that I haven't an advantage this year' attitude has caught little Dani out and the title is in no way settled.
On the track it was close too. All race long the pairing rode around together and looked every bit as likely of catching Rossi as Gobert getting a job in a bank. But making matters worse was that Pedrosa was still a big wuss and couldn't ever land a decent passing move on Stoner. Even in Parc Ferme he couldn't get past.
Behind the podium boys came the ride of the day – Alex de Angelis on the first of the 'Slow White Hondas' (SWH). Starting from a lowly grid position Alex's sub-lightning reactions allowed him to be out-dragged into the first corner by Denning's pet slough on an early reconnaissance exercise. But Alex wasn't about to be average – not today anyway – and spectacularly fought his way up through the field to just miss out on a podium finish.
This excellent ride in no way signifies, however, that de Angelis will be anything other than normal next week.
Losers? Time to cut and paste from my other reviews.
De Puniet
The flapping Frenchman, just like every time this season, fell off in less time than it would take a Frenchie Fisherman to start a blockade. Another poor result for the SWH team.
Hayden
Nicky's final season as a Repsol Honda rider really a 'swan song' – more of 'crow cry'. A mysterious mechanical failure saw the inbred hero drop so far down the field that the Alice Ducat's beat him. Thankfully it wasn't so bad that West beat him.
Kawasaki
Not only do Team Green have Anthony West as a rider but they also have a crap bike too. It was a second mechanical breakdown in consecutive races for the Angro American John Hopkins leaving him absolutely no reason to show off his million dollar smile. At the end of the main 200mph straight Hopkins found himself unable to change down gears leaving him no chance of slowing down. After filling his pants he filled in the faces of his crew for giving him such a heap of junk.
Melandri
What hasn't been said already this season about Marco Melandri? How about 'good' or even 'nearly average'.
The equestrian Italian looked again as comfortable on the Ducati as a BMW rider in a group of poor people. After qualifying it was already looking very poor. In the race Randy de Tumble decided to fall off again and Melandri, excited by the prospect of actually overtaking somebody, lost control and also piled into Lorenzoland.
Where does Marco go from here? The job centre if rumours are to be believed.
Whereas Melandri actually looks like a horse – one due to be shot anytime soon.
In Monte Carlo, Italy.
After tax
MotoGP race report, Mugello
Seven in a row and three in a row for Rossi
(02/06/2008)
Some things have an air of inevitably about them. Take the bi-monthly Foggy biographies – you just know it will contain the word 'I' more than any other word. Or take a far less sour grapefruit – you just know it will squirt you with concentrated citric acid in your eye the moment you cautiously stick your spoon in.
At Mugello everyone just knew that Rossi would win. The aromatic Italian had won at Mugello for the past six years and this year, unlike the last two visits, Rossi was already on a high.
Colin Edwards calls Valentino Rossi 'The GOAT'. Thankfully this has nothing to do with those unsettling rumours of the time the Italian became trapped in his motorhome with Nicky Hayden. The G.O.A.T, Colin claims, stands for Greatest Of All Time - although some say the American uses a different word for 'G' when referencing the time Rossi was trapped in his motorhome.
(Interestingly Pedrosa is known as P.I.G. (Personality Inexcusably Gone) where as Edwards himself is not ever known as C.O.W (can often win)).
After his dip in form over the past two seasons Rossi again looks like the GOAT we all knew he was.
So, as predicted, Rossi did win. But sadly he was taking no chances this time. In the good old days Rossi just couldn't loose – he was the Schumacher of MotoGP only far more popular and less of a dirty cheat. In them days Rossi would take a leaf out of my cat's book of etiquette and, for his enjoyment and ours, play with his prey tossing them around the garden before chewing their head's off.
But things have changed. In 2006 proceedings turned sourer than a Pedrosa family grown lemon. Suddenly the wins weren't a formality. That year Nicky Hayden won the world championship. Understandably Rossi presumed that a high magnetic field, caused by solar unbalance, must have corrupted the fabric of continuity and that normal service would resume for 2007. But it never did and this time the world championship winner, Casey Stoner, actually deserved to win the title.
All of which meant that come Sunday Valentino was taking no chances and after his usual average get away stormed to the front of the field and rode away to take the flag. It wasn't a classic race. Indeed it wasn't even a 'forgotten era' race. After breaking away from his rivals the furry 46 eased out the gap in a mediocre style that would have had any F1 fan grinning from ear-to-ear whilst downloading Max Mosley videos.
So, with the top slot of the podium being more secure than the scaffolding around the chin of a Schumacher statue who was up for taking the Mamola honours?
Sadly the possible candidates of Loris 'Leaky' Capirossi and King Midas Lorenzo would falter and fall.
Hang on…" you ask "Capirossi?" Well sort of. In qualifying the lung-split Italian managed to land himself on the front row. To achieve this Loris teamed up with chum Rossi and slipstreamed the Yam rider throughout final qualifying to gain that all important extra edge. If Loris wasn't small or was German then this would have been branded as 'filthy cheating' but because he's knee-high to smoking imp then his on-track swindling was reclassified as 'cheeky'. Sadly for Loris this didn't work when the taxman came knocking at his door.
Nevertheless, and not taking German tactics into consideration, Loris and Suzuki seemed to have upped the pace (at Vermeulen's expense) and altogether looked stronger than at any other time this season. But it wasn't to be. Little Loris found himself crowded out like the time he was queuing for sparrow rations with adults and could only manage a disappointing sixth/Edwardth position.
And what of Lord Loony Lorenzo? We all know that when the chips are down, or in his bones, he never fails to impress. Until today. After a brilliant start from the third row his golden nuggets were up into sixth and looking sparkling. But for once his gold became tarnished as the savour of MotoGP lost control of his Yamaha like his grip on reality. Into the gravel he went, nuggets and all.
So taking up the challenge were the personality aloof pairing of Stoner and Pedrosa. Off the track the pairing are becoming great rivals – Pedrosa's the reigning 'miserable ....' champion but Stoner, and his 'it's not fair that I haven't an advantage this year' attitude has caught little Dani out and the title is in no way settled.
On the track it was close too. All race long the pairing rode around together and looked every bit as likely of catching Rossi as Gobert getting a job in a bank. But making matters worse was that Pedrosa was still a big wuss and couldn't ever land a decent passing move on Stoner. Even in Parc Ferme he couldn't get past.
Behind the podium boys came the ride of the day – Alex de Angelis on the first of the 'Slow White Hondas' (SWH). Starting from a lowly grid position Alex's sub-lightning reactions allowed him to be out-dragged into the first corner by Denning's pet slough on an early reconnaissance exercise. But Alex wasn't about to be average – not today anyway – and spectacularly fought his way up through the field to just miss out on a podium finish.
This excellent ride in no way signifies, however, that de Angelis will be anything other than normal next week.
Losers? Time to cut and paste from my other reviews.
De Puniet
The flapping Frenchman, just like every time this season, fell off in less time than it would take a Frenchie Fisherman to start a blockade. Another poor result for the SWH team.
Hayden
Nicky's final season as a Repsol Honda rider really a 'swan song' – more of 'crow cry'. A mysterious mechanical failure saw the inbred hero drop so far down the field that the Alice Ducat's beat him. Thankfully it wasn't so bad that West beat him.
Kawasaki
Not only do Team Green have Anthony West as a rider but they also have a crap bike too. It was a second mechanical breakdown in consecutive races for the Angro American John Hopkins leaving him absolutely no reason to show off his million dollar smile. At the end of the main 200mph straight Hopkins found himself unable to change down gears leaving him no chance of slowing down. After filling his pants he filled in the faces of his crew for giving him such a heap of junk.
Melandri
What hasn't been said already this season about Marco Melandri? How about 'good' or even 'nearly average'.
The equestrian Italian looked again as comfortable on the Ducati as a BMW rider in a group of poor people. After qualifying it was already looking very poor. In the race Randy de Tumble decided to fall off again and Melandri, excited by the prospect of actually overtaking somebody, lost control and also piled into Lorenzoland.
Where does Marco go from here? The job centre if rumours are to be believed.
Whereas Melandri actually looks like a horse – one due to be shot anytime soon.
In Monte Carlo, Italy.
After tax
